I went to the movie theater the other day. I drank a giant ass cola. You know, the large one, the one that's 98 ounces of soda- you know, the kind that's roughly like drinking a six pack of Coke, and then some.
I always get this one... you know why? Free refills. I am the guy that thinks, "Sure I could store a gold fish in there for months on end- but yes, I could also drink two of those."
Yes, yes, I know it's roughly 124% the size of my stomach- the drink is actually bigger than my stomach- but I'm pretty sure I can drink two of those... I mean, it's like buy one get one free!
I never finish the drink. I do however have to pee like a guy that has just drank a bunch of soda for two hours straight while sitting in a 65 degree darkened room.
So, I went to the bathroom just after the movie the other day-
and I saw this guy, at a urinal, in flip flops (I assume he finished and zipped) he pivoted to turn away from the urinal and as he did his flip flop stayed on the floor as his foot came out of the flip flop... since he had already pivoted and shifted his weight, he stepped forward onto the bathroom floor and stepped onto the bathroom floor with his bare foot.
Gross. Very Brittany Spears. Gross.
The man looks down at his foot. He spins, puts his foot back in the flip flop, walks to the sinks, tousles his hair, and walks out the bathroom.
Gross. He didn't wash his hands.
Sure, I decided to pee all over the floor, but at least I washed my hands!